My Best Stories

What are my best stories? What would I choose if I was sitting in the Red Chair about to be dumped if I was boring for a nanosecond?

My celebrity encounters are kind of boring. Shaking hands with JFK while he was on the campaign trail and getting a button from him which my grandmother hated because she was voting for Nixon. Having coffee with KD Lang at the Sidetrack Cafe and mutually deciding that we would hate working together, even though I told her I loved her voice and her cowpunk show, wondering if she’s antisemetic although I am not Jewish and her perhaps wondering if I am anti gay or vegetarian, even though I didn’t know she was either at the time and if I had would have no trouble with either. Still even the tension of that is boring. OK, how about writing a song with Catherine O’Hara. Yawn. Or meeting Arlo Guthrie as an unknown cousin 30 years after having a tour cancelled where I’d be opening for him and people telling me I reminded them of him. Nap time!

Well there’s my personal musical journey that includes rock bands, blues bands, jazz gigs, composing for orchestra and classical piano, writing comedy songs for a popular national radio series blah blah blah. Trying to make myself important or interesting is almost worse than pretending I’m a real life Forest Gump. Especially in the wake of the death of David Bowie, who worked in secret, did not reveal to the public that he was dying, and then released his last album and videos after he died. So the work truly should and is the joy of it, and not the trappings of fame, or talking about it. No wonder there are so few interviews with artists, because they know that talking about their art somehow lessens it.

That still leaves me with my desire to entertain and tell a good yarn. Fiction is out of the question- I suck at it, unless I’m trying to tell the truth and I need to embelish with a bit of exaggeration. I was always afraid to lie for a number of reasons, top of which is that I was afraid nobody would trust me, which of course, they don’t anyway, why trust a stranger?

Am I having an unbelievable life full of extraordinary things worthy of songs and sonnets? Absolutely! But I’m starting to believe it doesn’t matter if I try to preserve my stories for the cold and heartless eternity that awaits us all. Nevertheless I will probably have a go.

It doesn’t escape me that NOBODY is reading my blog or leaving comments. I must truly suck at blogging and promotion. Ironically, protection of privacy is a big issue these days. Ha ha ha.


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